What Will Blakespear Do if She Loses the State Senate Election?

§ Move to Carlsbad, run for and win a City Council seat, persuade Lisa Shaffer to do likewise, form a majority coalition with Councilman Peder Norby, and screw up Carlsbad worse than she’s screwed up Encinitas.

§ Declare the election fraudulent, stage a coup at Encinitas City Hall, abscond with a trove of city documents and hole up at her family compound in Cardiff.

§ Renew her law license, shack up with California State Senate President Pro Tempore Toni Atkins and her spouse, Jennifer LeSar, and represent them in their development projects as their personal attorney.

§ Start a physical therapy business in Encinitas with her husband, Jeremy, to compete with Kristin Gaspar and her husband, Paul.

§ Cool her heels, then challenge Terra Lawson-Remer for her District 3 San Diego County Board of Supervisors seat before her term expires in January 2025.

§ Renew her law license and become the estate-planning attorney for all the friends she’s made in Encinitas and throughout San Diego County.

§ Announce her candidacy for governor of California as soon as Governor Gavin Newsom announces his candidacy for president of the United States.

§ Open a bicycling school in Encinitas with her husband, Jeremy, to teach cyclists how to negotiate the Cardiff Cycle Trap without crashing and having to call 9-1-1. 

§ Other (please specify)

Blakespear Chickens Out of Debates With Gunderson

As the top finisher in the state Senate District 38 primary, Republican Matt Gunderson offered Democrat second-placer Catherine Blakespear an opportunity to contrast her views with his in three debates ahead of the November election.

Blakespear’s campaign manager, Kevin Sabellico, declined Gunderson’s offer, saying that Blakespear would not debate Gunderson until he takes a more explicit stance on abortion rights. 

Gunderson says, “I am pro-choice, and I support and will continue to support California law, which enshrines the right to choice.”

That’s explicit.

The purpose of debates is for candidates to state their views in public. That informs voters’ choices.

Blakespear is hiding. She’s afraid of Gunderson. She should drop her lame excuse and show up for the debates.

Nextdoor Tackles the Important Issues in Encinitas

Among the many social media sites that address crucial issues in Encinitas, nextdoor takes the unchallenged lead. Here are some examples:

Post: “My bicycle has a flat tire.”

Comment No. 1: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 2: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 3: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Post: “My dog ran away.”

Comment No. 1: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 2: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 3: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Post: “An oriole is stealing nectar from my hummingbird feeder.”

Comment No. 1: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 2: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 3: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Post: “A car is blocking my driveway.”

Comment No. 1: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 2: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Comment No. 3: “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

Self-Presumed Mayor Jeff Morris Wants to Cut a Deal With Trump

From: Jeff Morris

Sent: Thursday, March 10, 2022, 11:03 AM

To: Donald Trump

Subject: Potential Common Ground

Good Morning Former President,

I know you don’t read anything longer than a tweet, so I’ll keep this short.

You and I have a lot in common:

• We both lead a cult.

• We both know that “Only I can fix it.” You the country, me Encinitas.

• We both had or have New York hags as scammer candidate opponents.

• We both lost or will lose an election, proving the system is rigged.

• We both are frauds. I propose that neither of us rats on the other.

Sincerely,

Jeff Morris

Chiquita Banana Accuses Juan Valdez of Sexual Harassment

“It’s not enough that some gringo fruit hawker exploits my ethnicity to sell bananas,” said Chiquita Banana. “Now it’s Juan Valdez groping me at a trade show in Panama.”

According to Banana, when she and Valdez separately attended a Latin American commerce trade show in Panama City, Valdez made unwanted advances that included groping Banana in an elevator. Valdez has denied the allegation.

“I did no such thing,” said Valdez. “I’m a happily married man with children and a donkey. I stick to growing coffee beans. I saw Chiquita Banana at the trade show but didn’t speak to her and was not in an elevator with her.”

Panamanian authorities have taken statements from Banana and Valdez and will continue to investigate. However, with no coffee-stain evidence on Banana’s clothing or person and no witness to confirm Banana’s account, it’s doubtful charges will be forthcoming.

“No charges?” said Banana, “That’s outrageous! I’ll charge Valdez in a song!”

I’m Chiquita Banana and I’ve come to say

Señor Valdez shouldn’t touch me in sexy way

 

When hands are stained with brown but not a British tea

 

They’re coffee-grower’s paws to keep away from me

 

You can put them in the soil — You can work them as you toil

 

Hands in pairs are yours to use with — But never yours to abuse with

 

As Chiquita Banana I need my personal space in an elevator

 

Away from Juan Valdez on the moon or near the equator.